Since 1981, the month of October has been recognized by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence as a Day of Unity to victim advocates across the country. Most of us don’t know what to say or have a lack of knowledge about domestic violence and sexual assault which plays a large part in why these issues persist in our society. Simply wanting to help is a huge step toward ending the shame and stigma that survivors deal with every day. Dr. Heidi Stapley, Assistant Professor of Psychiatry, shares with us how domestic violence and sexual assault affect our society and mental health.
Why is it important to raise awareness of domestic violence?
Many of our patients, throughout all fields of medicine, are victims of domestic violence. Much of the personality construct of a domestic violence victim makes it difficult to reach out for help or disclose abuse. Victims may not even realize what they are experiencing constitutes abuse. As providers, we should understand the signs of abuse, and make it part of our regular conversations. In doing so, we can help identify the persons living with it, and provide appropriate intervention and support. Open conversations also serve to reduce the shame and stigma that domestic violence patients experience.
Why do victims sometimes return to or stay with abusers?
Victims often believe that they are deserving of the abuse and that their actions were the cause of the violence. Some victims may have grown up in an environment that was similar and may not recognize the dysfunction in their relationship. One of the most common reasons for staying with abusers is fear of the abuser. Some of the most dangerous times for victims of Domestic Violence are when they attempt to leave the relationship.
Do abusers show any potential warning signs?
Typical warning signs early in the relationship are jealousy and controlling behavior. Abuse can be insidious allowing it go unrecognized for a time. It usually starts with small behaviors, such as controlling clothing choices and social activities. Most perpetrators will work to separate their victims from friends and family. This makes it more difficult for others to intervene, and creates a reliance on the abuser. Typically, the abuse will start as emotional and may transition to property destruction prior to physical attacks.
Is it possible for abusers to change?
It is possible, with a desire to change and treatment involving anger management and improved coping skills. This usually involves ongoing or long-term treatment and education. Those with the best outcomes are abusers that tend to offend in situational settings, who lash out due to poor coping skills. Abusers that terrorize and control their victims are much more likely to re-offend.
Are men victims of domestic violence?
Absolutely. Often men will not disclose or report abuse, especially if perpetrated by a female, for fear of ridicule and disbelief.
Does LGBTQ community experience domestic violence?
Yes. Some statistics show that this group may experience violence at an even higher rate than heterosexual couples. According to domesticshelters.org, 44% of lesbian women and 61% of bisexual women experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner, vs 35% of heterosexual women. 26% of gay men and 37% of bisexual men have been victims of intimate partner violence, compared to 29% of heterosexual men.
Similar to some of the bias against heterosexual male victims of female perpetrators, at times homosexual victims are not believed, or the abuse is considered less serious when it involves same-sex couples.
How does the economy affect domestic violence?
Generally, reports of intimate partner violence and child abuse increase with worsening financial stressors. Abuse can also decrease productivity and increase time away from work, which may lead to a cycle that perpetuates violence.
What can society do to help?
Being aware of the signs as well as early intervention with more vulnerable populations. Be aware of the signs of abuse, especially in vulnerable populations, and intervene as early as possible. Once identified, offer available resources to help provide safety and social support. Finally, become familiar with any local programs to provide therapy to victims and families that have experienced abuse.